


K-I-S-S-I-N-G

by twangcat



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cultural homophobia, Kid Fic, Little Philip Coulson wants to be just like Captain America, Phil and Clint are little kids, Set in the 1980s, but I'm tagging just in case, one kiss between little kids but it's so innocent I don't think it needed warnings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2015-10-17
Packaged: 2018-04-26 19:18:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5017117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twangcat/pseuds/twangcat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Philip James Coulson is nervous on the first day of preschool. His mom dressed him up in a pair of scratchy dress pants and a collared shirt that feels too tight around his neck; but he does like is his new Captain America backpack, his Captain America lunch box, and his Bucky Bear stuffed animal. Every kid was told to bring their favorite cuddly to sleep with during nap time and he’s sure he’ll be safe with Bucky Bear beside him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Philip James Coulson is nervous on the first day of preschool. His mom dressed him up in a pair of scratchy dress pants and a collared shirt that feels too tight around his neck; but he does like is his new Captain America backpack, his Captain America lunch box, and his Bucky Bear stuffed animal. Every kid was told to bring their favorite cuddly to sleep with during nap time and he’s sure he’ll be safe with Bucky Bear beside him.

At least he’s sure until he gets to school.

The school is big and his new dress shoes make loud clacking noises that echo down the polished hallway. He holds on tight to his mom’s hand and when they get to the new classroom there’s a whole bunch of kids he’s never met before racing around the room and making more noise than he knows is allowed inside. There’s also a tall stranger with big bushy blond hair there who introduces herself as Mrs. Shell. She’s huge. Even taller than his dad and she smiles so big and wide he thinks she might be about to eat him up. She crouches down to shake his hand but he’s not fooled, he knows she’s big and he proudly tells his mom he’s not allowed to talk to strangers and refuses to take her hand.

His mom laughs at him and Philip scowls at her.

His mom says, “Philip, this is Mrs. Shell. She’ll be your teacher for this year. She’s not a stranger anymore and you should do everything she says.”

Philip puts on his best grown-up face and bravely reaches out his hand to shake hers. He says, “Hello Mrs. Shell. My name is Philip.”

Mrs. Shell says, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Philip. Your mom says you can read your name. Can you find your cubbyhole and put away your things?”

Philip proudly races across the room and puts his stuff away and it’s only when he returns that he realizes he has been tricked. His mom has put her gloves back on and it’s obvious she’s about to leave.

Philip’s little chin starts to tremble and he knows he’s about to cry. He’s a big boy. He’s too old to cry, but he’s not ready to be left here alone. He grabs on to his mom’s leg and tries to hide behind her.

His mom kisses him on the cheek. “Be a good boy, Philip. No more tears. Big boys don’t cry right? Would Captain America cry right now?”

Philip bites his lip and tries to stem the flow of tears. He shakes his head no.

His mom says, “Now be a good boy and make Cap proud. Okay?”

Philip nods his head and his mom kisses him once more before she leaves.

Unfortunately his day doesn’t get much better from there.

He tries to play with the bricks with a boy named Anthony, but Anthony’s really good at building things so he takes all of Philip’s bricks and builds the tallest tower that Philip has ever seen. It makes little Philip want to cry because he wanted to build a tower too. But he knows better than to take other people’s toys, so he walks away.

He tries to join the reading corner because he knows how to read, but Bruce is already there and he must be super super smart because he can read books without pictures all on his own.  After that, Philip doesn’t feel so proud of being about to read his  _Thomas the Tank Engine_ books all on his own.

Clint and Thor are playing tag, but they both run so fast that when Philip tries to play with them, it ends up being monkey in the middle and he’s always the monkey because he can’t catch either one of them.

Eventually Philip just sits quietly at the coloring table and hopes nobody will notice that he’s clumsy and stupid and slow and more like a useless lump than like Captain America.

At lunch time they are all told to sit in their assigned seats and Philip is glad he doesn’t have to talk to anyone. But Clint sits beside him and Clint keeps running around the classroom and making a fuss.

The third time Mrs. Shell orders him back to his seat, Philip notices that Clint doesn’t have a lunchbox.

Philip looks at his shiny new Captain America lunch box. Cap always says it’s important to share and his mom says it’s important to give things to people who don’t have things.

This time when Clint sits back down at this desk and starts to fidget, Philip slides half of his peanut butter and jelly sandwich over to him. He’s not really sure what to say, but he can put it there and see what happens.

Clint looks over at him with big scared eyes and for the first time Philip realizes how small the other boy is. He’s so fast, Philip never noticed how tiny he is. He’s skin and bone.

Philip says, “It’s okay. You can have it.”

Clint reaches out tentatively for it. “Are you sure?”

Philip smiles for the first time all day, it feels good to do something nice. He nods. “Yes.”

Clint smiles back at him and tries to shove his half of the sandwich into his mouth in one giant bite. Phil laughs because he looks like a chipmunk which his bulging cheeks and when Clint laughs too he feels like maybe school isn’t so bad if he can have a friend.

Clint asks about his lunchbox and Philip happily tells him all about Captain America until the teacher says it’s nap time.

Philip races to his cubbyhole to get his Bucky Bear and all the other kids run too, but for the first time all day Clint is the still one in the classroom.

Philip walks slowly back down the row of cubbyholes; Clint’s cubbyhole is completely empty. He doesn’t even have a coat.

Philip takes Bucky Bear back to his seat.

He thinks really hard about it.  Bucky Bear is his best friend but Clint doesn’t have a teddy bear, and Captain America always says it’s important to share, and Bucky Bear is a really big teddy bear – sitting on the ground his head comes up to Philip’s knees – they could each hold on to an arm.

Philip turns to Clint and holds out his bear. He says proudly, “Bucky Bear is Captain America’s best friend and he’s super brave. Would you like to share him with me?”

Clint hesitates for a minute and then he jumps at Philip and tackles him with hug. They both go tumbling down to the ground laughing, but Mrs. Shell already laid out the sleeping mats so it’s a soft landing.

Philip usually always complains that he’s a big boy and doesn’t need naps anymore, but when Mrs. Shell turns down the lights, it’s really easy to fall asleep holding on to one of Bucky Bear’s arms. When he wakes up, Clint’s kicked off his blanket and rolled over so he’s lying right beside Philip, half hidden under Bucky Bear.

The rest of the day is better.

Clint helps Philip build a tower of blocks and Philip reads Clint a story. Clint’s never heard of Thomas the Tank Engine and he’s super impressed that Philip can read all the words.

When Philip’s mom picks him up, he talks the whole ride home about Clint. He tells her that Clint’s favorite color is blue, that he’d never heard of Captain America and that he runs faster than any of the other kids.

His mom kisses his cheek and tells him how happy she is that he made a friend. Philip also tells her he wants to have two sandwiches for lunch at school because he’s a big boy now. She tells him he’s going to be as big as his dad one day and promises to make him two.

 

* * *

 

Clint and Philip become best friends. Every day Philip gives Clint his extra sandwich. Some days Clint has a lunch of his own and on those days they combine their lunches and only eat the best parts. When Clint’s mom packs him a lunch she always includes homemade dessert. Philip’s mom always packs fruit for dessert; but, Philip gets a lunch everyday so he doesn’t complain.  They play tag together, read together, have lunch together, nap together (they always end up cuddled together by the end), and then do it all over again in the afternoon. But Clint also makes friends with everyone else in the class.

Clint runs races with Thor, he and Anthony double-dog-dare each other to do everything (Philip still doesn’t like Anthony), he even makes friends with some of the girls (he’s the only boy who doesn’t think girls have cooties).

Usually Philip just colors when Clint plays with the other kids, but sometimes Clint demands he play too and that’s fun too. Unless it’s with Anthony. Anthony still hasn’t learned to share and Philip doesn’t like it when he takes his toys and he doesn’t understand why Clint laughs when Anthony knocks down their tower.

Philip is happiest when it’s just him and Clint. Clint is quieter than the other kids and he never takes Philip’s toys without asking and he’s learning to love Captain America as much as Philip does.  He wants to have Clint over for playdates, but Clint’s parents won’t let him, so they only get to see each other at school.

Today they have the bricks all to themselves because Anthony and Bruce are both reading and Steve and James are playing tag with Thor and Loki.

Philip says, “It’s going to be Christmas soon. Can you come over during the holidays since we don't have school?”

Clint says, “My Ma says no, she says since you can’t come over it wouldn’t be right for me to go over.”

Philip pushes the bricks away angrily. “I wish you just lived with me, then we wouldn’t have to go to school to play together.”

Clint says, “I can’t live with you, we are from two different families, only families live together.”

Philip pouts, “Well then we should be family.”

Clint says, “We both already got families. You only get new families if you get married.”

Philip says decisively, “Okay, then we’ll get married.”

Clint says, “Can we do that?”

Philip says, “I don’t know. What do you have to do to get married?”

Clint scrunches up his face. “My Ma’s always watching these movies on TV where they get married. They have to walk down an aisle, say they want to get married, and kiss.”

Philip smiles brightly at Clint. “Is that all? That’s easy! Do you think this hallway would count?”

Clint shrugs. “I don’t see why not?”

Philip says, “Okay, you stand here, I’ll walk back to you, and then we can get married.”

Clint says, “Perfect!”

Philip runs down to the other end of the hallway and then he walks back to Clint. He says very solemnly, “I want to marry you.”

Clint says happily, “I want to marry you too!”

Philip pushes his lips out into a big pucker and bumps them against Clint’s lips. “Yippee! Now we’re married.”

Behind him he hears Anthony’s raucous laughter, then he starts taunting, “Philip and Clinton sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Philip pushing the baby carriage.”

Anthony keeps the taunt going and the whole class starts joining in. Mrs. Shell tries to shush them, but Anthony cannot be silenced once he’d decided something needs to be said.

Once Mrs. Shell understands what the kids are saying, she look scandalized at Anthony. She says, “Anthony, you can’t say things like that! Two boys can’t kiss and get married.”

Philip is so angry at all of them he shouts out, “Yes we can. I kissed Clint and now we’re married and there is nothing you can do about it!”

Mrs. Shell towers over them as she stalks towards them like a monster out of Philip’s nightmares. She screeches at them, “Philip James Coulson, go stand in the corner right now. Clinton Francis Barton, go stand in the corner at the other side of the room. You are both very bad boys and I’m going to talk to your parents about you.”

Philips never been yelled at like that before and he’s never had the teacher want to talk to his parents before. Anthony and Loki get in trouble all the time, but Philip’s always been a good boy. He takes one glance at Clint who looks scared to death and who is refusing to look at him and Philip suddenly knows that he’s done something very very bad even if he doesn’t understand why.

Philip goes to stand in the corner and he wishes he could have Clint beside him or at least his Bucky Bear, but he’s not allowed either.

 

* * *

 

Mrs. Shell doesn’t just want to talk to their moms; she calls during the day time and demands that both Clint and Philip’s dads’ come pick them up from school.

Philip knows this going to be bad, but he doesn’t know how bad until he’s sitting on the bench outside the principal’s office, listening to the yelling inside.  His little legs are too short to reach the ground and he’d be more nervous, but he’s got Clint beside him and Clint’s really scared, he’s kicking his feet and won’t sit still, so Philip holds his hand and lets him hold Bucky Bear. He tells Clint it’s going to be okay even while he listens to the voices on the other side of the door.

At first it is muffled and they can’t hear the words so they just sit there together hoping it will end soon, but Mr. Barton starts getting loud. He shouts, “Your perverted son did what?”

Philip’s mom says, “He’s just a little boy, he didn’t understand. Please, calm yourself.”

Mrs. Barton says, “Your filthy little son had better not be doing anything nasty with our boy.”

Mr. Barton says, “What your son needs is a real man to take him over his knee and teach him right from wrong. Where is your husband anyways, Mrs. Coulson? Is it even, ‘Mrs.’?”

Philip’s mom raises her voice and he’s never heard this tone of voice from her before. “Colonel Coulson is currently involved in the war effort overseas, but I’ll be sure to pass on your concerns. Just so I can give him the right context, what exactly is it  _you_ do, Mr. Barton?”

Mr. Barton says, “Why I ‘oughta!”

Mrs. Shell screeches, “Mr. Barton!”

Mrs. Barton says, “Mrs. Coulson, just you make sure your boy keeps his hands to himself.”

The door to the principal’s office bursts open and Mr. Barton’s eyes focus on where Clint and Philip are holding hands. He growls,. “Clint, get over here. I don’t ever want to see you touching that boy again. Just you wait until we get home, mister.”

Clint is ripped away from Philip and thrown over his dad’s shoulder. Clint looks back sadly at Philip, but he doesn’t say a word as he leaves.

Philip’s mom crouches down in front of him. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

Philip nods but doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t understand what’s happened and he doesn’t want to make it worse.

He gathers his things and his mom walks him out to the car. He holds on to her hand. He’s a big boy and he doesn’t need to, but right now he wants his mommy.

In the car she says, “Do you understand why what you did is wrong?”

Philip shakes his head no and blinks quickly so he doesn’t cry. He doesn’t know why he feels like crying but he knows he doesn’t want to, not even in front of his mom.

She says, “Boys can’t kiss each other or marry each other, it’s wrong.”

Philip’s voice trembles, “But I love Clint. He’s my best friend and I want to marry him.”

She says, “Oh sweetie, I know you think that, but he’s a boy. You’ll meet a nice girl some day and then you’ll understand why it’s different. Clint sounds like a nice boy, but his dad’s not very nice and I don’t think he works. I want you to tell me something honestly: have you been giving your second sandwich to Clint?”

Phil nods.

“I understand, and I’m proud of you for sharing. You’re a good boy, Philip James Coulson. You’d make your daddy proud. Why don’t we go home and write him letter? He’d like to know that you’ve been taking care of your friend.”

Phil says, “So I’m not bad?”

She kisses his check and then wipes away the lipstick. “No baby, you aren’t bad. Just confused.”

Philip’s dad doesn’t come home for Christmas, but they get a rare phone call on Christmas day and a package arrives with spices and a special thick letter for Philip that his mom helps him read. He spends time with his family and his cousins. It’s a nice break, but he misses Clint.

 

* * *

 

The desks at school have always been alphabetical by last name so Barton and Coulson were side by side.  The first thing Philip notices when they come back after Christmas is that the desks have been rearranged so they are alphabetically by first name and now Clint and Philip are at opposite sides of the room.

Mrs. Shell pulls Philip aside when he arrives and says, “You’re going to be a good boy, right, Philip? No more funny business.”

And Phil feels a little sick inside because somehow he knows that she means Clint and he understands a little bit better now than he did before the holidays so he nods and says, “I understand. I’m sorry about what I did.”

Mrs. Shell smiles at him. “I knew you were good boy. Okay, go take your seat.”

When he and Clint finally talk, the first thing Clint says is, “I can’t marry you, Philip.”

Philip says, “I know.”

Clint says, “And I’m only allowed to be friends with you if you promise not to kiss me again.”

Philip says, “I promise.”

Clint smiles at him. “Okay then. Do you want to go play blocks or read?”

Phil jumps up and grabs Clint's hand already dragging him towards the reading corner. "There's a new Thomas book, just wait till you see what happens!"

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first kid fic. What did you think?
> 
> You can come chat with on Tumblr, I'm at https://www.tumblr.com/blog/twangcat
> 
> Also, the lovely Pegasus_Eridana wrote a sequel to this which is adorable! Go check it out! http://archiveofourown.org/works/5108531


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